ahhh life is good, the sun is shining the birds are singing and i am so happy today. i just know that some asshole is going to fuck my day up.

well my life has been really shit lately. My mother and i still are not talking, good for her. She is so childish or maybe im too mature for my whole 22 years of living. I don't think i want to be with my partner anymore. I feel like he is suffocating me and i can't handle it. I don't like being hugged and kissed all the time and i don't think that you need to tell someone 20 f-ing times a day that you love them for them to feel loved. at least all is going well with work i enjoy my job but having him tag along with me while i'm working and i still have to look after the kid is all too much for me. i feel like running away. and i still have not seen my good friend that fucking boyfriend of his is an asshole. It's his birthday on monday, i will still phone him and wish him happy birthday even though he seams to forgotten mine. I know what i need - a bottle of vodka and a dildo, then i can get on with my jolly times. I miss me, the drunken one who sleeps in the garden cause she can't find the bed. This me sucks i hate feeling depressed, fuck it friday i am bringing out party p-nut!

its been a while since i last wrote on my blog but so much has been happening, not good.
i don't even know where to start....
First my mother has left the company i work for and tried to drag me along, i refused, and now she is no longer talking to me.
My brother came for a visit and had a horrible stay due to so much tension. he had a wonderful holiday touring around Japan and morocco and Egypt to a bitchy mother who couldn't get her way. It was my 22nd birthday on Friday and she didn't even speak to me.
Now i am driving illegally and loving it, at least i get time on my own now. I am currently having a really hard time putting my frustrations into words.
I'M JUST PISSED OFF.

It has just occurred to me that i have done sweet f-all today but fiddle with my computer. you know instead of looking up a number in the phone book (which would take me 2 min) i spend 1 hour trying to look it up on the web. i started freaking out when i couldn't check my e-mail (maybe i really really wanted to see if a client had replied to one of my e-mails) no i just wanted to see what shit my friends had sent me today. Shit maybe i am becoming an Internet junkie.

I have quit shaving my legs, i am tired of shaving every 2 - 3 day to keep my legs silky smooth when no one even sees them cause they are so horribly white. i cannot wax cause it gives me a horrid rash. i will still be shaving my arm pits cause that would just be nasty. but i am going al-natural, my poor fiance will just have to get use to sleeping next to the yeti!!!

im not feeling very happy today. yesterday it occured to me that i might as well give up on a friendship that has many years behind it. The thing is i've seen him twice in a year and he lives about a ten minute drive away. he got this boyfriend (whom i think is not the best for him) the guy is about 14 years older than him and very controlling. At his 21st a very good friend (whom we haven't seen for over a year) of ours came to his party he neglected ALL of his friends and spend the whole night with his partners friends. He got drunk last weekend and phoned me and told me that he didn't have many friends left. He use to be out going and friendly to everyone always up for anything, now he has been transformed into the "BITCH" in the relationship, even his dress sense has changed to screaming queen. i know that everyone changes when they get into a new relationship but he has done a 360 on us, i don't know what to do, but i feel this friendship is nothing more than a passing hello.
I'm so upset

just read my comment from Jackdaw, i will have to cut that friggin card up. i was thinking about nicking it while he is asleep.
I am having a very good month (work wise - i rent houses) so now that i've made exta cash, it'll go to the credit card! i haven't bought myself something in almost a year, but hey it'll be my birthday next month (i just like the party bit) so i'll be getting very very drunk. WHY?? My brother is coming to see me (he is in the Royal Marines) and he hasn't been with me for my birthday since i was 15 years old (i'm turning 22). So i know this b-day will be a friggin good one.

i was hoping that some one could help me with this one...
Why do men feel the need to max out the credit card and buy shit we really don't need/can't afford. my fiance wants to buy everything he can get his hands on and we are in so much debt its going to take us a very long time to get out of it, yet he can't control his spending habbits. And then its woman who get the blame, i haven't use the credit card at all, yet i'm the one who paid it off the last time. all the men in my life are the same with money they aren't happy unless they have it. what i want to know is why do they need money to be happy?

i am so angry today, my bladdy mother (not my mother in law this time but my own flesh and blood) has been treating me like a fucking slave all day. i knew it was going to be a bad day when woke up, my 2 year old got hold of my ciggies and broke a few. he is a good kid but man did he have to have a go at the smokes??
speaking of smoking i need to quit, but everytime i quit and start again i end up smoking more. you know my life has become so fucking boring, i work (sometimes, he he) i go home i cook (i suck at cooking and have set fire to my kitchen twice - please note that i was perfectly sober when this happened) and then i sleep. i am currently too poor to do anything fun, so i am fucked, speaking of that i can no long get my jolly's off with my fiance cause i'm too fucking scared of falling pregnant again.
Man i really am pissed off, and i blame it all on my mother in law - THAT BITCH!!!!

hola all,

i look friggin good today, although i wish i could feel as good.
i don't really have much to say, had a fucking horrible weekend, i did not (as i had planned) get shit faced, instead i had to endure an entire day with my mother-in-law. My in laws really piss me off and i just can't get around it. I am currently enjoying my day taking the piss out of my mother. I have no clue where my brother is, he is in another country hiking up some mountain, oh the joys of being in the royal marines pitty he has to go to war. my bro is one of the coolest people i know although some days i would just like to kick his teeth in.